Dock of the bay

In the predawn hours the clouds were slowly emerging from under the night’s cloak over the Pacific Ocean. I watched a pair of Pelicans do their synchronized skimming; just above the waters of the Los Angeles River, as they looked for their school of fish. They swam upriver and disappeared and then soon returned still executing that tantalizing close flight to the water with the occasional dive to catch their prey. They were intent on their morning catch, in what is largely an unknown ditch across the city; and finally turns into a bay where the old Queen Mary is docked, as a tourist attraction and hotel in Long Beach.
The palms were lining the Marina as the light got brighter and the distant hills came into view. The sun was still not up as I walked, and the morning awaited its appearance. There seemed to be a hush of expectation from the new day as the night had brought passing showers to parched southern California.

The palms and flowers planted looked greener and brighter and a few drops remained in some places adding to the expectation of hope of better things to come. A few fitness enthusiasts were around passing me on their bicycles or just jogging along the scenic pathways; bordering the river, and the landscaped gardens. I watched the light going off, in the city of lights; as the dawn approached. I knew that in this city of dreams and #hope, the dreams of millions fade into the night, as they awake to a new day.
I find a dock and as I sit looking at the bay, I just can’t get Otis Redding’s words out of my head, “Looks like nothing’s gonna change
Everything still remains the same
I can’t do what ten people tell me to do
So I guess I’ll remain the same, listen”
Reflecting with the endless waves of the ocean; I find that my body is growing weaker, from a lack of workouts and exercise. My mind is not as sharp; from a lack of stimulus and also the aging process, which is destroying billions of synapses and cells in the brain. My heart is growing weaker from its inability to love and express affection, whether it is physical or emotional. My habits are not conducive to a better life and the smoking is burning my lungs, throat and body up slowly but steadily. My soul is starving as I do not allow the universe to bring its healing power to me, but remain confined in my narrow world of sin and suffering. My life is wasting away on this bay and nobody is here to show the path, of where to go.
Then I allow the mind to become still in the ancient meditation taught by the Buddha, as I close my eyes and look inwards and allow compassion to spread outwards. A gentle ocean breeze tickles my skin and the sounds of the sea gulls encroaches the peace. I sit still and let the past fade and the future recede and the present is all there is. Thoughts and feelings arise and I let them come and go and stay unattached. I enter the darkness of my consciousness and drift on the ocean of eternity.
Suddenly the darkness is thrust asunder by a light that seems to arise from the deepest darkness of the time before creation. My eyelids turn orange and my eyes are no longer under my control. They burst open and I see a straight line of bright light leading from where I sit across the ocean to the mountain peak across the bay. A single ray from the rising sun peaking over the valley has appeared for me, and only we know each other in a primordial dance of life. Another day has begun and #hope and life are etrnally reborn; I rise to live another day, with the past and my personal pains forgotten.

This entry was posted in Hope, Life is valuable, Self actualization and tagged , , by Rajiv Kapoor. Bookmark the permalink.

About Rajiv Kapoor

Rajiv Kapoor was born in New Delhi. He was educated by the Jesuits at St Xavier’s, and graduated with Honors, from The University of Delhi. Rajiv Kapoor did his MBA in International Business from Penn State and is now settled in the US. He has traveled across most states of India, when he was working on modernization of Rice Mills, and understands their diverse culture and history. This book is a historical fiction, dedicated to his city of birth. His extensive research dives deep into a critical moment, in India’s long history, for his latest Historical Thriller “The Peacock Throne Wars”..

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